Why Meditation Appears So Difficult

In a calm neighbourhood close to the hills in North Wales, the UK, we were conducting a meditation programme. Everyone was contentedly seated, it was a calm day, and the morning session had just began when a motorbike started revving just outside the window. While the owner was performing repairs, a loud and obnoxious noise kept going on, stopping and starting. It brought to mind how, during meditation retreats, we would frequently be asked, "How do you stop the bell?" In England, church bells can ring nonstop. Assume the role of the bell.

An elderly monk in England once related to us that as he was giving a lesson near to a construction site, a loud pneumatic drill started up. As he put it, "We had to become the drill," as forcing the mind to be completely still is not the point of meditation. Instead, it is releasing resistance to whatever arises.

Listening to the sounds outside or the constant conversation in our heads is one of many reasons why meditation can seem demanding or even difficult. Even if it's only for ten minutes, we rapidly grow bored if we don't accomplish anything, and this is especially true if we don't know why we are doing it. But why does simply remaining motionless while paying attention to our breath cause us to feel anxious, afraid, or even hostile?

1. I'm too busy, and I'm too stressed.

This may be the case, for example, if you have a full-time work and a lot on your plate, such as raising small children. However, we are only discussing a few minutes per day—possibly 10. Most of us read the news or browse the internet for longer than that. We just give the impression that we don't have the time because we typically cram every minute with activity and seldom take a break. Although meditation is one of the best treatments for stress, there is no known medical solution for it, so making room for it is worthwhile.

The most crucial thing is to become friends with meditation. It won't do you any good if you feel compelled to meditate, for example, and then feel bad if you skip the scheduled time or meditate for only 10 minutes instead of the promised 30. It's much preferable to practise for a brief period of time while having fun than to clench your teeth while doing nothing because you've been persuaded that just 30 or even 40 minutes will make a difference. Throughout life, meditation can be a friend to turn to for support, ideas, and clarity, just like an old buddy. Enjoy it while you can!

2. My mind won't stop thinking.

I simply can't unwind. My mind is making me insane! Sounds recognisable? It is impossible to stop your mind from thinking; it is similar to attempting to halt the wind. Because the mind jumps from one thing to another, continuously preoccupied and distracted, it is said to resemble a monkey that has been bitten by a scorpion while intoxicated. You find all this frenzied activity going on and it feels outrageously noisy when you try to sit quietly and quiet your mind. The truth is that there is nothing new about it; you were simply oblivious of it before since you were so immersed in the incessant talk.

It's quite normal to feel like your mind is constantly going. Years of mental activity, the creation and maintenance of dramas, tension, confusion, and egotism have left the mind unable to relax. Instead, it yearns for pleasure and diversion. The sense of silence is cumulative: the more you sit, the more the mind becomes quieter. It's not as if you can abruptly turn the mind off. Just bring your attention back to the present now whenever you see your mind wandering, daydreaming, remembering the past, or making plans for the future. not another.

3. There are too many distractions; it's too noisy. 

We can no longer retreat to a remote cave, live there in peace, and emerge years later having attained enlightenment. Instead, we are all subject to environmental noise and demands. though, and this is a major though, we don't have to give in to its demands. Can you hear traffic outside? Fine. Just let them pass you by and stay put. You won't find peace and quiet outside, but rather inside.

4. I don't see the point.

It's at this point that you'll have to take our word for it. Some people see the value in meditation after only one session, but for most of us it takes more time — daily practise for at least a week to see a difference. This means you have to have faith in the procedure to keep continuing even if you don't see immediate results. After years of experience both as students and teachers, we can confidently say that the effort will be more than worthwhile.

Remember, hours of practise are required to master a piece of music, whereas in Japan it might take up to 12 years to master the art of flower arranging. It only takes a moment to stay motionless, but it could be a while before that moment actually arrives, therefore practise and patience are required.

5. I'm no good at this; I never get it right.

You can't really mess up at meditation. Nothing is right or wrong, and no particular methods are required. Deb's guru told her that there are as many variations of meditation as there are meditators. You just need to commit to whichever method you decide to use. There are several forms of meditation, including sitting on the floor, sitting on a chair, moving meditation like tai chi or walking, focusing on the breath, repeating a mantra, or cultivating loving kindness. Countless variants exist.

6. It's all just weird New Age hype.

Meditation is as old as the hills, but it's easy to become lost in the New Age's myriad promises of everlasting bliss. More than two millennia and a half ago, the Buddha was an avid meditator who experimented with several techniques for achieving mental stillness. And that's only the tip of the iceberg. There are numerous iterations of this topic throughout religious traditions that span centuries. Therefore, there is nothing novel or out of the ordinary.

Do you find it hard to meditate? Input is welcome below. If you click the "Become a Fan" button up top, you'll get updates on our blogs every Thursday.