Keys to Surviving a Marriage Crisis

If you and your spouse are going through a rough patch, take heart! Crisis strikes in the healthiest of couples, but you can get through it. If you want to save your marriage, consider these steps:

1. Seek qualified counsel. 

Get some good advice. You'll need somewhere you can vent your frustrations and get constructive criticism as you go through your complicated range of feelings, loss, and options. Find a therapist who aligns with your ideals (a Christian therapist would be the greatest choice) and speak openly and honestly with her. It's wonderful if your partner is willing to go to counseling with you to solve problems. But if he isn't prepared to accept assistance, moving alone will still serve you well.

2. Don’t broadcast your business.

Think carefully about who you tell that you're having problems in your marriage. The less people there are, the better. Involving the town's rumor mongers won't solve anything and may make matters worse. It's also important to remember that even if you've forgiven your spouse and are ready to go on with your life, other people, such as your extended family, may find it more difficult to do the same. Make sure the person(s) you confide in appreciate your need for privacy if you choose to do so.

3. Protect your children.

Keep your kids out of the dirty details of your divorce if at all possible. It's an unnecessary source of stress for kids, and it makes things more difficult for everyone at home.

4. Focus on wisdom and grace. 

Practice elegance and discretion. In order for a marriage to last, both parties need to be able to forgive one another on occasion. And what is grace?

Inexplicable favor. So pray hard and delve deep to discover the grace to forgive, even if your spouse made a tremendous error. If you're at fault, you should make an honest effort to change your way of thinking or your situation. Pray for guidance in figuring out how to avoid further encounters with this problem.