The 3 Lies Men Believe About Themselves

All of that transpired in about a minute. The Rams' starting quarterback was Nick Foles, and they had dropped their previous two games. Foles, quarterbacks coach Chris Weinke, backup quarterbacks Case Keenum, and Sean Mannion, and the rest of the team sat in a game-planning room. Head coach Jeff Fischer walked in all of a sudden. While appreciative of Foles' contributions, he stated that the quarterback would no longer be used as the team's starting quarterback. Fischer then retreated as swiftly as he had arrived, catching Foles off guard. Just two years after being named to the pro bowl, Foles opted to call it quits at the end of that season. We lose.

Just two years later, he was named the Super Bowl's Most Valuable Player—how did he do it? Foles describes his unique narrative in his book, Believe It: My Journey of Success, Failure, and Overcoming the Odds. His self-deception was the largest roadblock on his path to rediscovering the thrill of playing and rising above defeat. In fact, I believe that all men have difficulty not believing a falsehood. If men continue to believe lies, they will always be helpless. Foles's perspective on the game of football was transformed when he learned to identify and discard the falsehoods he'd been fed. In what ways will this affect you? Here are 3 myths that males commonly hold about themselves.

1. I am what I do.

If you allow yourself to believe this falsehood, you will never be better than your most recent accomplishment. If you win, you are a winner. If you lose, you'll feel like a loser. Just the facts. Foles bought into this falsehood. As confident as he had been before the last game, he now felt. The moment of liberation came when he understood he is more than the sum of his achievements and setbacks. He realized his true identity as a beloved child of God, who is loved without condition. After that happened, football had nothing to do with building character. It was simply a matter of putting his God-given talents to use. What special abilities has God endowed you with? Don't gauge your worth by comparison to them. Your inherent worth is high. Go outside and have some fun.

2. I am what people say about me.

If you buy into this falsehood, you'll feel as good (in your head) as the last compliment you received. As a result, many men hide their true selves from the world in order to fit in. They give it their best shot to conform to an ideal they believe other people have of them. The person is just pretending to live. Do you require constant reassurance? Is there a domino effect when somebody says anything unflattering about you? We all need encouragement, and definitely, negative feedback stings. You will remain a hollow shell of a human being unless you can face the truth and accept yourself. There will always be some who question you, who think poorly of you, and who speak evil of you. You might as well deal with it now rather than later. No matter what anyone says, you look great.

3. I am what I have.

If you buy into this falsehood, you will be worth as much as the value of your assets, your reputation, and your influence put together. It will make you greedy because we can never have enough to feel full. Worry and stress over keeping what you have will set in. As you compare yourself to others, you will begin to doubt your own worth. You are more than your level of money and employment (or lack thereof). How influential or powerful you are in the world does not determine who you are.

Why are you valuable?

Here's what Foles learned about his worth, and it changed everything: A God who made him loves him no matter what. That's what makes him so irreplaceable. As he sees it, so do I. In what ways are you special?